Your Average Vocaloid High School Story And Definitely Nothing Else
by The Little Dickens
Summary: This is a parody of the average, cliche Vocaloid high school stories, that is trying too hard to be funny. Not to be taken seriously. Rated M to be safe. Cover is forever alone because I am.
1. Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

**Did you know disclaimers are pointless.**

* * *

Rin Kagami woke up to the sound of her alarm. She turned it off and closed her eyes again. But then her mom walked into the room and shook her lightly.

"Wake up, Rin-chan! Today is the first day of school after summer," mom said and got up to open the blinds.

"Please, okaa-san… Just let me sleep…" Rin mumbled.

"If you don't get up now, I will get Lily-chan to carry you out of that bed," okaa-san threatened.

In less than a second Rin was up. She really didn't want okaa-san to get Lily. Lily was her onee-chan, and she was such a meanie! Not to mention a skank, too! She would often dip little Rin's head in the toilet when they were younger. Every time when Rin was excited about something, Lily would find a way to mock her and ruin her happy mood. She was the reason Rin had an unhappy childhood that is obligatory to the main character. Rin was treated very unfairly!

Luckily, Lily wasn't in the kitchen when Rin came downstairs to eat breakfast.

"What should I eat for breakfast, oranges, oranges or oranges?" Rin thought.

"I think I'll go with oranges," she decided.

While eating her oranges and humming happily, she glanced at the wall clock. Even though Rin just woke up in the right time, somehow she was now going to be late.

"Crap! I'm going to be late!" she exclaimed.

Rin grabbed her school bag and was out the door. She ran to school with sakura petals twirling in the air around her. When she finally made it to school (in time, too), she instantly spotted her best friends from the crowd of like a thousand students.

"Miku-chan! Teto-chan!" she shouted and ran towards them.

"Hi Rinny!" said the girls in unison and smiled happily.

Then the bell rang. The girls started walking inside and giggling because that's what school girls do.

* * *

In class, the girls picked their seats in the back row, next to each other. Rin sat in the middle. Miku was on the right side and Teto on the left. They giggled some more but then quickly shut up and stood up when the teacher stepped into the class.

"Ohayo students," he said.

"Ohayo, Kiyoteru-sensei!" the class responded.

"Today, we'll be having a new student joining us," said Kiyoteru-sensei. "Please treat him gently."

Then the new boy opened the door and came in. Rin craned her neck to see his face better and cursed herself for sitting in the back with her short loli physique. The boy got in front of the class to introduce himself.

Wait for it…

 _Wait for it…_

"Hajimemashite. My name is Kagamine Len. Please take good care of me"

(The new guy is LEN! What a surprise! There's no way you saw that coming!)

"Very good, Kagamine-kun! You can take a seat next to Kagami Rin-san there," said Kiyoteru-sensei and pointed to an empty seat on the left side next to Rin.

"Wait, didn't Teto sit there just a second ago?" Rin thought.

However, Rin forgot the mysterious, unexplained disappearance of her best friend, as the hot Len Kagamine took a seat next to her. The seat just happened to be the one in the back, next to the window. Rin couldn't take her eyes off of Len as the sun shined on his bishonen features. He looked like he could be Rin's twin brother or even mirror image, whatever sense that made! His mysterious, cool eyes were blue like a beautiful summer sky, his lips full and soft, his skin smooth and flawless. The light glimmered beautifully on his shiny, golden hair. He had thick bangs that were a bit messy in a hot way, and in the back his hair was tied into a small ponytail that looked like a sexy banana.

" _What is he,"_ Rin thought to herself. _"He resembles me so much that it's almost creepy! Our surnames are nearly the same, too! Naturally, the only rational thing to do in this situation is to try to get into his pants."_

"Kagami-san, maybe you could show Kagamine-kun around during lunch break?" suggested Kiyoteru-sensei.

"Maybe you could," smiled Len and turned to face Rin. Poor Rin blushed so hard that she looked like a tomato!

 **~~~Time skip to lunch break~~~  
**

 **(Imagine time skips etc. as being sung by a choir of angels)**

Rin sat down in the cafeteria and took a sip of her orange juice. She was so nervous, because after eating her lunch she had to go show Len around the school! Her small little heart wouldn't stop beating when he was around! (Well, she might die if it did)

"Hey, Rinny, you look worried. Is something wrong?" Miku asked suddenly while digging into her leek casserole.

"What? Of course not! I am definitely not thinking about Len-kun's hotness if that's what you're saying," said Rin a little too fast.

"Well, that's not what I was saying, but it's good that you're okay," Miku said and started gulping down her vegetable juice.

"Wait, did you hear what I said?" asked Rin and went pale.

"Hear what?"

Thank god Miku was an airhead.

"Rin-chaaan!"

Rin heard a mature voice call her name. She saw an older brown haired girl with large oppai running towards her table. With her was a girl with long pink hair and equally large oppai. They sat at Rin's table.

"Hi, Meiko-neesan and Luka-neesan!" Rin smiled.

"Nice to see you, Rinny-rin!" Meiko exclaimed and ruffled Rin's hair. Luka just nodded politely, which made her oppai jiggle.

Meiko was a very nice and protective girl. To Rin, she was like the onee-chan that Lily failed to be. Luka was Meiko's best friend. She was often thought as the most beautiful girl in school.

A purple haired samurai-neko-ikemen walked up to Luka.

"Found you, honeybuns," he whispered and kissed Luka on the cheek.

"This is Gapuko, my new boyfriend," explained Luka before any questions were asked.

"Nice to meet you all," said Gupako and bowed.

"Now everybody has a boyfriend except me. I feel so ugly and unloved," said angsty Rin.

When Rin and her friends were done eating, Rin went to search for Len.

She found him in the garden, standing under the sakura tree.

"Um… Shall we go look around?" She squeaked.

"Ah, yes! It is very friendly of you to help me, Rin-san." His kawaii smile as he said that almost swept Rin off of her feet.

 **~~~Five minutes later~~~**

"So… Um, that is where the janitor keeps his brooms and buckets, and- oh! There are my friends! Let's go introduce you to them!" Rin said and unknowingly grabbed Len's hand.

"Hey guys," said Rin to her friends. "Len-kun, these are my best friends Miku Hatsune and Teto Kasane, we're all in the same class."

"Watashi wa sekai de ichiban ohime-sama," said Miku cheerfully, forgetting that this story is supposed to be in English.

"I have no personality," said Teto, smiling blankly.

"I do not appear in this story," said Gumi, who didn't actually say anything because she does not appear in this story.

"I hope we'll all get along well," said Len and bowed.

"I'm sure we'll do. Class is about to start soon, so we better get going," laughed Miku.

 **~~~In class~~~**

"I will now assign you in pairs and together you will do a big, huge, giant school project to start off the year," said Kiyoteru-sensei. "The pairs will be decided by drawing your names out of a box."

After drawing a lot of names out of a box, everybody had a pair. And they had all been paired up with their lover. Miku Hatsune was with Mikuo Hatsune, Teto Kasane with Ted Kasane and so on.

In Vocaloid High, there is somehow like an opposite gender clone of everyone, with the same surname and a very similar first name, but they are not related at all. And everybody is dating their clone. Nobody finds this weird or creepy at all. The only exceptions to this phenomenon are the vocaloids who have a designated love interest, like Meiko and Kaito, or Luka and Papugo.

This logic is not to be questioned.

Anyway, Rin had of course ended up with the steamy Len Kagamine. Who else could've she ended up with, as there were only 34 other students in her class? She couldn't focus on the subject, because Len's hotness was radiating into her eyes like a thousand suns. She would surely be blind before the lesson would even end!

Len somehow managed to be shota and ikemen at the same time. He was IkeLen!

Rin could only imagine him having hot, firm, oiled abs under that cute shirt of his. She could imagine bringing him in her bed, him stripping off all his clothes, and… No! No! She shouldn't think of things like that!

Little did Rin know, Len was gazing at her and thinking about all the same things.

Rin's delicate loli-moe-kawaii-shoujo-mikan body, in orange and black laced underwear, laying on his bed, and him unhooking her sacred garment and getting a load of… No! No! He couldn't spoil Rin's precious, innocent moe mind like that! He had to come up with a tactful way to get his banana into her donut hole.

Both blue-eyed blondes were snapped out of their thirsty daydreams when the bell rang and the school day ended.

"Um… I see we didn't get anything done," Rin mumbled.

"Yeah, we didn't. What if we did the project at my place tomorrow?" Len suggested.

"Sounds great! So… See you tomorrow! Okay bye!" Rin said sheepishly.

* * *

Rin walked home with her two friends and held her hands on her blushing cheeks. She was invited to Len Kagamine's house! Well, it was only for a school project, but what we've learned from many stories is that "school projects" usually lead to some bodily fluid exchanging.

"Can you believe this guys, Len-kun invited me over," she exhaled.

"Are you having sex?" Miku blurted.

"I don't know," Rin said. "Why would he think of me like that? I'm so plain and average and regular and mousy and nerdy," she ranted and flipped some of her angelic locks off of her model-like goddess face.

"Well, he just seems like he could be into you," Miku said. "What do you think, Teto?"

"I think whatever you think," said Teto mindlessly.

"Oh, look, we're already at my house. Bye girls," said Rin and took out her keys.

"Bye Rin!" Said the girls in unison, like satellite character best friends are supposed to do.

For the whole evening, Rin was very restless. Something was bubbling in her stomach all the time and she was sure it was the absolute feeling of love that she had developed in just one day. Though it could've been a fart, too.

She couldn't get any sleep that night. Even after midnight she was rolling around in her bed and staring at the ceiling, thinking about her first ever teenage love interest that would surely become the most important person in her life, and their love would be so strong that it would last until they died. The mental image of Len and the plans for the next day made her heart and ovaries beat so hard that she couldn't go to sleep. So she stayed up and kept whispering his name over and over again to see when it would get old.

Guess what?

It didn't.

 **~~~This chapter ends here~~~**

* * *

 **I wish I was at least half as funny as I think I am.**

 **The first chapter is always the hardest to write.**

 **I wish you didn't hate this too much.**

 **There are probably a ton of errors. Some of them are intentional, some probably aren't.**


	2. Projects forgotten, bitches named

**Thank you for the reviews! I really appreciate it!**

* * *

Rin was very, very nervous. She was currently standing on the doorstep of the Kagamine residence and waiting for somebody to open the door for her. How she knew where Len lived will forever be a mystery, since she didn't even have his number yet.

After a while the door opened and revealed none other than Len, his hair slightly wet and his white shirt unbuttoned. He smelled like shower.

" _Damn, the shota_ _ **does**_ _have abs,"_ thought Rin.

"Sorry you had to wait so long, Rin, I was in the shower," Len apologized.

Apparently he thought it was convenient to be taking a shower at 4 p.m. just before his guest arrived. But hey, it's not like Rin was complaining about his hot after-shower look.

"That's okay, Len! So why don't we get started on the project?"

"You could come in first."

"Oh, right."

Rin came in and looked around. Len's home looked pretty normal. It seemed like nobody else was home.

"Do you want something to eat?" asked Len.

"Hmm… Do you have any oranges?"

"I don't think we have any oranges, but we do have bananas."

"Okay, let's eat bananas, then."

Len tossed a banana to Rin, then took one for himself and they both sat down on the black leather couch. They started eating their bananas and planning the project.

Suddenly, Len leaned in and took a bite out of Rin's banana.

"Hey, that's my banana!" Rin exclaimed.

"Sorry, I thought it was my banana!" Len said with a sly dog smirk.

"It's in my hand," Rin pointed out.

"Our hands look exactly the same!"

Rin looked at Len's banana. Then she took revenge by taking a bite out of Len's banana. By "Len's banana" I mean the one that was in his hand. Specifically in his left hand, in his right hand was a whole different kind of "Len's banana."

" _That was an indirect kiss,_ " Rin thought, blushing like the infamous tomato.

"I guess we're even now," laughed Len sexily. Then he leaned his face very close to Rin's and said very cheesily: "Let me take the upper hand again."

And then they made out.

The project was totally forgotten, because fuck the project, that thing was just thrown in to the plot just to make these two bang or something.

* * *

 **~~~Time skip to school~~~**

Len was sitting in the garden in the cool guy's spot with his two new bros, Kaito and Gagapo. Indeed they were now inseparable friends and also the most popular guys in school. Don't ask for a logical explanation for how they instantly became the most popular, because there isn't one.

"Guys, do you have any advice on how to get into an inexperienced moe girl's heart and also in her pants?" asked Len.

"Why, you have someone in mind?" Kaito raised his eyebrows.

"I met Rin Kagami two days ago and I am now certain that she is the love of my life," said Len.

"I've been dating Luka for about two weeks, so I am a master at these kind of things," said Pugako and made a face that looked very samurai.

But Gakpak wasn't a real samurai, he was just a weird wannabe. Yet he still managed to be one of the most admired boys in school besides Len and Kaito. If this story was realistic, people would think he was crazy. But because nothing makes sense, his samurai-ness only adds to his sexiness, and it is a fact that sexiness gets you popularity. His hot, long eggplant ponytail is also totally not gay at all.

"You have to show her that you care about her and really want to be with her," said Kagaipo, pretty much stating the obvious, because the author can't write good advice on love as she doesn't know shit about it.

"Thanks, Kaito and Gapu! I know what to do now!" exclaimed Len and quickly ran away, getting a sudden burst of energy from the cliché advice.

Meanwhile at Rin and her friends' hangout spot, Rin was only thinking about the only thing that mattered at the moment, her dearest Kagamine Len-kun-chan. And also oranges, because her character wasn't developed beyond these two things yet.

"I'm so rich and popular, hahaha! I really love leeks!" Miku blabbered.

"Your hair looks so beautiful, Miku-chan," Teto complimented emptily. "I do not have a life of my own."

"What are you thinking about, Rin?" asked Miku, annoyed at Rin for not paying attention to their pointless conversation.

"Len-kun," Rin said dreamily.

"This is getting old already and it's only the second chapter!" Miku huffed. "Oh, it looks like Kagamine-kun is coming over here now that he was mentioned!"

Len ran up to Rin with that anime-ish determined look in his eyes.

"Rin-saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!" He shouted with way too many a's.

He was totally not exhausted at all after running literally from the other side of the school to here faster than lightning, powered by his endless love for Rin-chan-mikan-tan. The previous sentence was not sarcastic.

"Kagami-san, please go on a date with me, onegaishimasu!" Len proposed while bowing very japanesely.

"Len-kun…" breathed Rin again for no reason.

"My feelings towards you are definitely genuine, so… please accept my request!" Len said, sounding like an awkward anime sub.

"Len-kun…" said Rin yet again, sounding like one of those orgasming anime girls who lack the ability to say anything except their love interest's name.

"I… I will accept it!"

"Finally she stopped sounding like a broken record," said a relieved Meiko, who totally was there the whole time but wasn't yet mentioned.

"Now Rin is not lonely anymore," said Luka who also was there the whole time.

"Way to go, Len!" shouted Gupo, who was supposed to be somewhere else.

"That's our boy," cheered Kaito, who was also supposed to be somewhere else.

"Yay for young love!" shouted Haku, who appears in this story for the first time.

"Good luck!" said someone named Sakura, whose identity and random appearance will never be explained.

"What's going on?" asked Kiyoteru-sensei who probably just came over.

By the way, guess which vegetable Rin's face looked like?

* * *

Nobody noticed that somebody was stalking them. That somebody was a pretty, yellow haired girl with neko-like eyes and a long side ponytail. She was snapping pictures of the blonde lovebirds with her cell phone. The girl was known to be bitchy and jealous, even though she hadn't really done anything yet. But the readers must dislike her, because in Japanese fanworks, Len is often paired up with her instead of the favorite of the western weeaboos, Rin.

Even saying her name will send the hardcore RinLen shippers into an unstoppable rage tantrum, with endless screaming and crying at the thought of Len even looking at a girl that is not his twin.

Neru Akita.

Feel anything?

"Who does that bitch think she is? She has no right to be involved with Len-kun, he's my boyfriend even though he doesn't even know who I am," Neru whispered angrily.

She sent a picture of Len and Rin to all the members of the Kagamine Len fan club (run by her), with a caption: _"Look at this bitch, getting asked on a date by our Len-kun. She must be destroyed."_

Neru had indeed started a club called the Kagamine Len fan club. It had only been two days since Len came to Vocaloid High, and his fan club already had more than 50 members, so many girls and even a few boys were lusting and drooling over him only.

Neru smirked evilly and closed her phone.

Meanwhile elsewhere, one particularly crazy member of the fan club felt her phone vibrating in her pocket. She flipped her phone open (they still use flip phones!) and read the text sent by the Akita bitch.

"My Len-kun… Going on a date with some ugly bitch?" gasped the girl, who was surprisingly named Tei Sukone.

"I can't, I won't let such a thing happen! I'll save my precious Len-kun from that wicked bitch," she declared towards the sky, probably looking like a total idiot. Then she started devising an evil plan to get rid of Rin. A psychotic grin appeared on her cucumber-loving, Len-obsessed face.

She was known as a yandere who had probably killed somebody before, but apparently all the authorities thought that the obviously mentally ill, murderous girl's place was out in public and not in a padded cell.

"Just you wait, Kagami Rin. The end of your life is near!"

* * *

 **~~~Time skip to Saturday evening~~~**

Rin and the empty shells also known as her best friends were in Rin's room picking an outfit for the date. Rin's whole wardrobe was all over the floor, and none of her endless outfit options felt right! Angsty face.

"Waah! I so don't have anything to wear!" Rin cried from the middle of her mountain-sized pile of expensive and stylish clothes.

"Aw come on, everything so far has looked amazing," Miku groaned.

"Nothing looks amazing because I am so ugly! My chest is too flat and my stomach is too fat and I'm too tomboyish to wear any of this stuff!" cried the very girly girl Rin.

"How about this one?" asked Miku and held up an orange poofy dress that appeared out of nowhere. Rin had never seen it before and had had no idea she had it. It was like straight out of Rin's dreams!

"It's perfect for the date! Thank you, girls!" Rin exclaimed joyfully and hugged Miku and Teto, who had done absolutely nothing to help.

Rin picked some black pumps, a black bracelet and an orange and black bow. She also applied some orange lipstick and dark mascara, and she was good to go!

"But wait, I have no idea where we are going!" Rin realized. "Oh, look! Len's number has magically appeared in my contact list! I'm going to ask him," she said when she realized that Len's number had magically appeared in her contact list.

She texted Len and found out that they were going to some sort of fancy club and karaoke thingy.

"It's time for me to go now, wish me luck!" Rin said excitedly.

"Good luck, Rin," said the girls because they will do anything that Rin asks.

* * *

 **~~~At the fancy club and karaoke thingy~~~**

"Crap, I am late!" exclaimed Rin, because female protagonists are always late wherever they go.

Len was already waiting for her in front of the fancy club and karaoke thingy's doors.

"Len-kuuuuun!~Sorry I'm late!"

"I can forgive you for being late since you look so good," said Len, eyeing Rin from head to toe.

Len was dressed in a white shirt, a black tie and black skinny jeans. He was oozing with hotness and sexiness.

"Let's go in, shall we? Ladies first," said Len and opened the door for Rin.

Very gentlemanly for a 14-year old.

The lovers sat in a nice booth and started thinking about what they would like to drink.

"I'll take anything with oranges," said Rin, surprising everyone.

"And anything with bananas is fine for me," said Len.

"Will you just make your fucking orders more specific?" said the waitress.

 **~~~A moment later ~~~**

"Would you like to sing karaoke, Rin?" asked Len, obviously wanting to hear Rin sing karaoke.

"Nooo! I'm too shy and my voice is not even that good!" Rin said, blushing tomato red.

"But look at all the songs they have!" Len tried.

Rin looked at the song list. "Suddenly, I am not so shy anymore!" she exclaimed and jumped onto the stage to sing karaoke.

"I will now sing a very rarely-used song: Migikata no chou!"

Everybody cheered. Rin started singing:

 **[Insert song lyrics here]**

When the song ended, the crowd was going wild.

"Rin," Len gasped. "I had no idea that you could sing like that!"

"Was I really that bad?" asked Rin the angstball, always thinking negatively of her practically perfect self.

"No! I mean, your voice… It's better than any voice that I have ever heard! I'm surprised that you don't sing more often!" said Len, who still couldn't believe his eargasming ears.

"Thank you for making me believe in myself Len-Kun," Rin thanked and smiled a very kawaii sparkly moe smile that melted Len's heart.

* * *

 **~~~After the date~~~**

They had a perfect date and Len was walking Rin home, because it was dark and scary outside.

"Thank you for walking me home, Len-kun. And thank you for the amazing date," said Rin when they arrived at the Kagami mansion. (Did Rin live in a mansion before? Cause now she does)

"I really had fun tonight, Rin," smiled Len and gave Rin a light kiss on the lips. "See you the next time I see you, bye."

"Bye…" exhaled Rin in enchantment. Then she started walking across the front yard to get to the door.

But poor, defenseless, precious, pure, delicate Rin had no idea that an evil psycho was lurking in the nearest bush. In a split second, Rin felt skinny arms wrapping around her tightly. A pale hand clasped over her mouth and she couldn't scream for help. She saw the person holding a gun in their other hand and pointing it towards her neck.

"Now it would be bang-bang and bye-bye, bitch," said a soft but creepy feminine voice and then broke into a psychotic laugh.

 **~~~Chapter 2 ends here~~~**

* * *

 **I shouldn't be writing this, dear god I have a huge literature project that should be done by next Friday.**

 **I am sorry for this train wreck.**

 **Much suspenseful,**

 **Very mystery,**

 **Such anticipation!**

 **How is our protagonist Rin going to get out of this trouble? Will she survive?**

 **Find out in the next chapter that nobody asked for!**


	3. Bullet in my right shoulder also traumas

**Thank you so much for reading this story and letting me know I still exist *wipes tear away***

 **Also tomorrow is Teto's birthday, happy early birthday TT, my empty-souled baby**

 **I'm glad I rated this story M**

* * *

" _I'm going to die,"_ Rin thought.

" _No! I don't want to die a virgin! I can't die before losing my virginity to Len-kun!"_

Tears of horror were rolling down Rin's face like the Niagara Falls, as Tei cackled maniacally.

"Now… SHINE!" (That's Japanese for "die") Tei screeched like a banshee. It felt like time slowed down when she pulled the trigger.

Blood red blood splattered on both of the girls' faces.

But it wasn't Rin's.

When the time was in slow motion, Len had suddenly appeared between Tei and Rin, and he had taken the bullet for her.

"L- Len-kun!" Rin screamed, even more tears flowing out of her tear ducts as she witnessed the horrific sight of her beloved Len-kun, lying on the ground with his eyes squeezed shut in agony and his white shirt quickly turning scarlet.

"I… killed Len-kun," gasped Tei, her eyes wide and her face drained of all color.

After a moment of devastating silence she screamed: "NOOOO! I SHALL DIE WITH YOU, LEN-KUN!"

Then Tei pointed the gun at her own temple and pulled the trigger again. More dark red blood splattered around as the girl fell dead. Rin stared at the traumatizing event while holding Len in her arms. Then she shifted her attention back to the boy.

"No… No… I won't let you die, Len-kun! I can't let you die! Not before we have sex! No…" she sobbed and hugged Len's body. When her tear drops touched Len's face, he slowly opened his eyes. (So no necrophilia? Bummer.)

"R- Rin-chan…" he whispered in a weak voice.

"Len-kun! You're… alive…" Rin gasped between her not at all ugly-sounding sobs. Len sat up carefully.

"You just got shot and you're bleeding a lot! Are you okay?" Rin asked, because it is customary to ask a clearly injured person if they're okay.

"As long as you're okay… I'm okay too, Rin." said Len and smiled painfully.

"Just tell me where the damn bullet hit you so I can call an ambulance," said Rin.

"It hit me in the right shoulder… that's the safest spot to get shot in," he said. (Note: read the TV tropes page "Only a Flesh Wound")

Len took off his shirt to look at his wound, and also to look sexy for Rin. Luckily, the wound wasn't very bad, and the excessive blood splattering had only been caused by the author's lack of knowledge on the human body.

"This injury will be forgotten immediately in this chapter anyway," said a relieved Len.

"Tei died in vain," Rin sighed. "Even though she tried to kill me, I can't help but feel bad…"

"Don't worry about her. She was probably dead inside already," said Len.

They left the gruesomely bloody corpse lying on Rin's front yard and went into the Kagami mansion to give Len first aid.

* * *

 **~~~Time skip to school~~~**

"Hey, Rinny-Rin-Rin-Ring-a-Ding-a-Ling!" said a hyperactive Miku.

"What?" said Rin tersely.

"I'm going to have a huge party for no reason tomorrow, and you're coming there!"

"Okay," said Rin.

The spoiled but sweet Miku grinned happily and jumped up and down. She was a perfect and innocent little angel, even though one would expect her to be a bitch since her parents owned a huge company that ruled like a half of the world. Miku lived in a mansion that was three times bigger than the Kagamine mansion. She always got what she wanted, unlike Rin, whose life was so unfair that her rich parents would never buy anything for her. Woe is her!

* * *

 **~~~Time skip to dinner~~~**

Rin was sitting at the dinner table with her family, eating dinner. Not breakfast or lunch, dinner.

"Mom, can you give me some money so I can buy a new outfit for Miku's party tomorrow?" Rin asked carefully.

"You have a huge closet full of clothes, can't you wear any of them?" Mrs. Kagami asked.

"I've already worn every single of them! It's embarrassing to go to a party in old clothes!" Rin cried like a spoiled teenage brat.

"Shut up, Rin! Why do you have to be such an ungrateful bitch?" Lily barked.

"You're the one to talk, Lily! Mom bought you a new dress when you went to a party with your new boyfriend!" Rin pointed out.

"The eldest daughter must always look great for her boyfriend," said Mrs. Kagami.

"Urgh! I can't take it in this family anymore! You've both been so rude to me after dad died!" Rin shouted, standing up with tears welling up in her eyes.

" _Don't cry, Rin…"_ she thought. _"You have so many traumas just like every protagonist ever, but don't show that you're weak, don't show that you have feelings like every normal human person ever!"_

 **~~~FLASHBACK~~~**

 _10-year old Rin was standing with her mom and Lily, dressed in all black. She stared at the lifeless man lying in the casket a few feet away. The road had been icy and slippery, and there was no way daddy could have avoided the crash._

 _Now Daddy was gone, and never coming back._

 _Rin's mom cried silently and dried her tears with a handkerchief. Lily just stared at the ground with her lip trembling._

" _I have to stay strong," Rin thought. "Whatever happens, I will absolutely, definitely not cry!"_

 **~~~FLASHBACK ENDS~~~**

Later, Rin was sitting on her bed, looking at the wall and breaking her corny promise to not cry for the 1000th time in her life.

Her mom came in and sat next to her.

"I'm sorry, Rin. I didn't realize I hurt you," she apologized and hugged Rin. "Let's go shopping tomorrow before the party, I'll buy you a new outfit.

" _Being poor and pitiful always gets me what I want!"_ Rin thought.

* * *

 **~~~Time skip to the party~~~**

It was dark outside when Rin's mom dropped her off at the Hatsune mansion. When Rin stepped out of the car, she saw Len walking towards her.

"Rin-chan, I've been waiting for you," he said. Pretty odd, since they had not really planned anything, but oh well, it didn't kill anybody so it was fine.

Together they walked through the courtyard that was lit with teal garden lights. The mansion was very fancy, with huge pillars and a patio with a pool. Rin could hear muffled music through the door. Len rang the doorbell, and in 10 seconds flat Miku opened the door.

"Hey guys, come in! You can leave your jackets over there."

"Thanks, Miku!"

Rin took off her jacket, revealing the outfit she had gotten her mom to buy for her by crying. She was wearing a tight orange and yellow striped top, a black mini skirt, black and yellow striped over knee socks and yellow skate shoes. Her bow was orange with black polka dots. She also had a purse that looked like an orange slice. She had orange sparkly eye shadow and orange glitter lip gloss on. Her hair was curled. Overall, she looked like a tacky bitch from the 80's.

"You look stunning," Len marveled.

Over a half of the school was there. Some of them were dancing to the loud music, some were drinking possibly alcoholic drinks, and some were just chilling and chatting with each other.

"Rin-chan, do you mind if I go over there for a moment?" Len asked, gesturing towards his friends, Kaito and Gagapoid.

"No, go ahead! I'll go get something to drink," said Rin.

Rin walked to the dining room, where there were three large tables full of refreshments. She was eating an orange cupcake when a guy with grey hair and red eyes came over.

"Hi, what's your name?" he asked in his deep and raspy voice.

"I'm Rin," said Rin. The guy looked exactly like Len, except that he had grey hair and red eyes, which made him look butt ugly to Rin. The guy lit up a cigarette. Don't smoke, kids. Smoking will kill you.

"I'm Dell. Here, taste this!"

Dell offered a tall glass full of reddish-pink drink to Rin. Rin hesitated for a moment, which made Dell smile like a dog.

"Don't worry, I'm not gonna drug you," he assured. He's probably going to drug you, Rin. Don't drink it.

Rin took the glass and tasted the drink. Dammit, Rin, you're too dumb to live.

"It tastes good," said Rin and smiled. She drank some more. Dell also drank something alcoholic. About a minute later, they had ended up together in a bedroom for some reason. The author is too lazy to set this up properly.

Dell was already very very veyr drunk.

"You're a very pretty girl, Rin, ya know that?" he smirked. Then he pinned Rin against the wall and started groping her.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Rin gasped. She felt too lightheaded to fight back. Why did you trust him, Rin? It was so fucking obvious that he's a rapist.

Dell brought his ugly butt of a face uncomfortably close to hers and started kissing her. He smelt like alcohol, cigarettes and farts.

"Nooo! I'm being raped!" cried Rin, who was being the damsel in distress again.

Suddenly, a bright white light started shining through the door. From the light emerged none other than Len-kun in a shining armor. He casually walked over to Dell and punched him in the face, saving Rin for the second time in the same chapter. Dell fell in slow motion and said "Oof!"

"Are you alright, Rin-chan? Let's get out of here," Len said, lifting Rin up bridal style.

"Oh, Len-kun! It was horrible! I am feeling so distressed right now!" Rin sobbed.

"Ssh, it's okay, it's over now." Len comforted her.

Len decided to take Rin home immediately. To his home, not Rin's.

* * *

 **~~~At Len's home~~~**

Rin cried and cried.

"Hey, you're safe now, Rin! There's no need to cry anymore," Len said.

"It's just that I was reminded of a past trauma," Rin sobbed. "I almost got raped in middle school."

 **~~~ANOTHER FLASHBACK OF RIN'S TRAUMAS, YAY~~~**

 _Rin was walking home from school. Sakura petals were falling slowly. She hummed happily and thought about her favorite thing in the world, oranges. Suddenly, the beautiful sakura street changed into a dark, dirty alley._

" _What?" Rin wondered._

 _Then a filthy, ugly rapist appeared from behind a corner._

" _Hello, sexy little girl. Now I will rape you," he said and lifted up Rin's extremely short skirt and pulled down her pantsu. Then he unzipped his own pants. Rin thought all hope was lost, until…_

 _Somebody broke a sake bottle on the man's head. He fell to his knees, holding his bleeding head and groaning in pain. Rin saw a blue haired boy and the brunette girl, who possibly just gave someone brain damage._

" _Meiko-neesan, Kaito-niisan…" Rin whispered._

" _Are you okay, Rin-chan?" asked Meiko and helped Rin get her clothes on. (Why did she need help with that? Pervert) Kaito didn't look, because he was a gentleman._

 _Rin was forever traumatized by this very originally written incident._

 **~~~ANOTHER FLASHBACK OF RIN'S TRAUMAS ENDS, YAY~~~**

"I'm sorry you had to go through that, Rin… I had no idea…" whispered Len, who apparently saw Rin's flashback somehow.

"It's okay, Len… You had no idea…" said Rin and sniffled.

"You know, I also have a very traumatic past. You see, I live together with my older brother, Leon, who is two years older than me. Our parents are not around, because… they died."

All the readers are supposed to gasp dramatically now.

"Our parents went to a concert one night when I was seven." Len told. "But they weren't back by midnight, so we got really worried. Then we got a phone call, telling that our parents had gotten in a car crash and died." Len did not show any emotion while telling his generic sob story.

"After my parents' funeral, I made up some very cliché mantra about being strong. And that changed my life and personality forever."

Rin and the weak-minded readers were in tears by now.

"From that day on, Leon has been taking care of me. Pretty weird considering that he was only 9 back then, but social services don't seem to exist in fiction anyway. Seriously, nobody did anything about Tei either."

"I'm so sorry for you, Len-kun… But, you know, my father has also died in a car crash." said Rin, hugging Len. "Funny, isn't it… since car crash is such a rare way to die in unoriginal fanfics."

"There's nothing fucking funny about people dying, Rin-chan," said Len.

( **FACT TIME!** Statistics about causes of parental death in generic fics: Car crash – 90%, Cancer – 10%)

"It must be a sign of something special that we both have a traumatic past. It must mean we are very important protagonists in this story," said Rin.

"This must be destiny," said Len.

"Yay, we are special!" They cheered and started making out.

 **~~~Chapter 3 ends here~~~**

* * *

 **I don't even**

 **I promised myself I wouldn't write another word for this story until my literature project was done**

 **And now it's done**

 **And this is too although it may suck I don't know I'm not going to read this over again today**

 **Thank you for reading this it means so much to me since I'm otherwise pretty depressed RN**

 **Steven Universe is coming back in June**

 **Shit**


	4. The bad guys appear! Rin and Len do IT

**Oh my god, the sentences I write for this.**

* * *

Rin woke up in the morning after a wonderful night of dreaming about Len-kun and mikans. She stretched a little. The sun shined beautifully through the window. Everything was perfectly perfect, except for one thing.

"CRAP, I'M GOING TO BE LATE!"

You had an alarm clock in the first chapter, Rin. What happened to that?

Rin stormed out of her house with a slice of toast in her mouth, like in those animus.

"Rin-chan, wait! Come back! You're in your pajamas!" shouted Rin's mom after her. Rin looked at herself. She had indeed been in such a hurry, that she ran out wearing her orange orange-patterned pajamas! 6-year-old kids would find this incident hilarious.

After changing into her school attire, Rin ran to school. Her mom was a real jerk for not waking her up even though she knew Rin was going to be late! Not watching where she was going, Rin bumped into someone and fell down on her buttocks.

"Itai… あっ! Gomennasai!" said Rin, suddenly speaking Japanese, and stood up quickly. The person she had bumped into was a boy that looked almost exactly like Len. What was up with all the boys looking like Len? The boy had ebony dark charcoal onyx raven jet black hair and yellow golden honey citrine canary lemon eyes. He just looked at Rin very coldly. He gave off a gothic, kind of a lone wolf aura. He has black hair, so what else would you expect?

He opened his pale ghostly gothic white ivory fair lips and a word came out coolly and smoothly:

"Ugh."

"So… bye!" said Rin and ran away. _"I have a feeling I'm going to see him again later_ ," Rin thought. _"I don't know why the fuck is that, but I just feel it so it must be true! Is this… Was this foreshadowing?"_

* * *

 **~~~In class~~~**

Kiyoteru-sensei was doing a roll call.

" _Where is Rin-chan?"_ Len thought to himself and not the others. _"Oh no, I sure hope she's not sick!"_ he thought and looked at Rin's empty seat in front of him. (If you remember the first chapter, Rin sexts _(Author actually wrote that by accident and it was too good to leave out)_ sits next to Len, not in front of him. Author, you should know these things.)

"Kagami Rin?" called Kiyoteru-sensei.

At that very second, Rin miraculously kicked the door open and shouted: "HERE!"

"Oh my… what a coincidence," said Kiyoteru-sensei.

When the roll call had ended, Kiyoteru-sensei said: "Now, I already said this in the very beginning of the lesson, but because the protagonist wasn't here then, I'll say it again. Two new students will be joining us today."

Again, very coincidentally, someone knocked on the door.

"Ah, that must be them!" Kiyoteru-sensei said and went to open the door.

The new students appeared and Rin gasped. One of them was the boy she had bumped into earlier! What were the odds? The other new student was a girl that looked like his twin, and she also looked like a dark goth version of Rin. This was not unusual in the Vocaloid world.

"Hello. My name is Kagene Rei, and this is my twin sister, Kagene Rui," the boy said, not even letting his sister introduce herself, that jerk. They both looked like unfriendly emo gothics, because in the Vocaloid world, black hair automatically means unfriendly emo gothics.

" _Oh fuck, this can't be true!"_ Len thought, his eyes as wide as big saucers. _"It's the mean bully from my old school who meanly bullied me because he was so jealous that I was so popular and he was an emo gothic freak!"_

It was such a coincidence that these people from Len's old school just happened to transfer into the same school as him, and so soon after he transferred. I could say that they switched schools just to bug our Lenny-kun again. Who the hell would do that in real life?

Rin watched as Rui sat in the empty seat next to her. (Sayonara, Miku! You're not important enough to sit next to the protagonist anymore.)

" _Why do all the new students have to sit next to me?"_ Rin thought and sweatdropped and chibified like in an animu. Like that was even physically possible.

Rui kept eyeing Rin and Len strangely for the whole day. Rin was obviously creeped out by this dark onyx ebony raven charcoal-

Okay, I slapped the author. Next time she writes like that, I'll kill her for good.

Anyway, Rin strongly disliked the new kids, even though she hadn't even talked to them yet. But because Rin got the first impression that the twins were pure evil Satan's children, it had to be true, right?

* * *

 **~~~After school at Rin's~~~**

Rin was hanging out with her friends in her room. They were talking about basic girly things like boys, guys and dudes, because that's all girls ever talk about.

" _I wonder what Len's doing right now_ ," Rin thought, and as if on cue her phone started vibrating in the back pocket of her sexy buttock-exposing white shorts that she was wearing even though it was not summer anymore.

"You got a vibrator?" Meiko joked, grinning like a sly dog.

"It's my phone, baka!" Rin exclaimed, blushing like a tomato. (Tomato counter: 4)

Rin opened her sugoi pink glittery Japanese flip phone that was completely covered in desu stickers and kawaii bling-bling rhinestones of different colors that looked like rainbow vomit. The caller was none other than her beloved koibito, Len-kun desuuuuu! The u:s are stressed.

"Hello?"

" _Hello, Rin-chan! Are you busy right now? I didn't interrupt anything important, did I?"_

"Oh, not at all! I was just hanging out with my friends at my place."

" _Okay, good, good… Listen, I just called you to ask if you could come to my place tonight at 9 o'clock?"_

"That's pretty late, but okay! I shall accept!"

" _Awesome, see you then! Bye!"_

"Bye," said Rin and closed the phone. Her friends immediately gathered around her like little chickens.

"Was it Len? It was Len, wasn't it? It was Len! What did he say? Did he say something hot? Are you finally going to bang?" Miku inquired repetitively.

"He invited me to his place at 9 o'clock! He didn't say anything else but I know for a fact that hot, juicy banana orange sex will ensue," Rin said. "You all have boyfriends, right? Can you give me some advice?"

"I know!" Luka shouted. "Shake your oppai in front of him! My dearest sex toy- I mean boyfriend Gakupakupouko absolutely loves it when I shake my oppai for him so hard that he nosebleeds for hours!"

"But I can't do that! I have the flattest pettanko AA-cup ever known to Vocaloid," Rin cried, squeezing her perfectly fine orange-shaped firm boobies.

"Kaito and I are the best couple ever," Meiko bragged. "Our usual romantic night consists of me hitting him with sake bottles and strangling him with his scarf, and when we get to bed, I whip him like a horse and make him scream my name. And he will never tell a thing to the police! That is true love."

"Me and my brother- I mean lover Mikuo are as close as conjoined twins, even though I haven't been spending any time with him in this story. We both like negis! If that isn't magic and destiny and blah blah blah unicorns horses, then I don't know what is!" Miku said and sighed dreamily.

"Bread," Teto said.

"Thank you girls! Now I'm ready to really win his heart and also his banana!" Rin exclaimed. Then there was a group hug and a lot of annoying giggling. Come on girls, get yourselves a real personality.

 **~~~Meanwhile at Len's~~~**

Len was hanging out with his guy dude bros, Kaito and Kapago. In fact, they had gotten Len to call Rin by threatening to steal his banananas if he didn't do it. Oh, the horror, the horror!

"Oh crap! It is suddenly 9 o'clock!" Len shouted, looking at the big clock on the wall. "You guys have to leave before Rin gets here."

"Okay, we'll leave…" said Kaito and shared looks with Gagap. "We'll leave alright…"

They walked downstairs and hid in the bathroom while snickering.

Then the doorbell rang and Len came downstairs to answer the door. It was Rin, of course. She was wearing the most kawayy white ruffled top, a yellow short harajuku-esque skirt and black over knee socks. She was standing innocently pigeon-toed and she had the most pure lolita expression on her face. Her bunny bow bobbed like it had a life of its own.

"Konbanwaaa, Len-kuuuun!~"

"Come inside, Rin-chan!" Len smiled.

Rin came inside Len-

-Len's house. She came inside Len's house. That's what I was going to say all along. Yes indeed.

They went upstairs to Len's room together.

"Would you like some orange soda?" asked Len, who was suddenly shirtless now!

"Yes, please, arigatou!" said Rin, drooling over Len's hot abs. Soon, Len brought two wine glasses full of the delicious orange drink. Why does Rin even like oranges so much? I think everything orange-flavored tastes like vomit. Oh well, moving on…

The author is too lazy to write any realistic buildup, so we'll skip straight to the action.

Rin decided it was time to get sexy. She started shaking her oppai in front of Len's face.

"Ooooohhhh! Sexy!" said Len and bit his lip. He quickly unzipped his pants. Then Rin ripped off her shirt and skirt, revealing slutty- I mean sultry orange black-laced underwear.

"Hot dayum!" said Len and blood sprayed out of his nose like a spitting fish fountain.

The next thing that happened was that Rin and Len fucked and fucked and fucked each other like horny rabbits. Even though they were supposed to be awkward 14-year-olds, everything went so smoothly and not awkwardly at all for them, the sex was just like in all teh movies. When they were done exchanging their sweet juices, they just snuggled together with soft, satisfied smiles. Rin fell asleep with the pleasant sensation of Len's banana and two oranges touching her butt cheek.

* * *

 **~~~In the morning~~~**

Len woke up in his giant bed with his banana throbbing slightly. He looked at the sleeping Rin's face and smiled gently. " _We really did it last night,"_ he thought.

Pretty soon Rin woke up and went to the upstairs bathroom to take a shower. She didn't even have a towel, WTF. Len had to pee and poop, so he went to the downstairs bathroom. But there was a surprise waiting for him.

"Kaito? Papago? What the hell are you doing in my bathroom? I thought I told you to leave!"

"Sorry, Len! We just had to stay! This bathroom is right under your room, so we heard everything last night," Gapkag said and Kaito nodded.

"How is this even possible? How come Leon didn't notice you?"

"I never notice anything," said Leon from behind his magazine that he was reading on the sofa.

"But… didn't you get hungry or something?" Len asked.

"We ate your toothpaste!"

Len facepalmed.

"…Get out," he grumbled.

 **~~~5 minutes later~~~**

Rin was scrubbing herself in the shower and singing a generic Kagamine song. Suddenly, the door burst open, because bathroom doors totally do not have locks. Len, who had just walked in on Rin showering, blushed like a tomato. (Tomato counter: 5)

"Oh, Rin-chan… I'm so sorry!" he apologized, acting all embarrassed. That dirty bastard did it on purpose, he totally knew that Rin was in the shower!

Rin just stood there butt naked, staring at him with a deadpan expression.

"Len-kun, it's too late to make a scene like this in this story. We had sex last night, so this isn't really awkward anymore."

"Blame the author," said Len.

* * *

 **~~~A few days later~~~**

A few days later, everybody in Vocaloid high knew that Kagami Rin and Kagamine Len were an item and that they had fucked already, thanks to the big mouths of Kaito and Cagupo. (So close, author! You'll get it someday.)

One day on lunch break, Rin sat alone on a bench in the sakura garden, reading a book. Then she felt two people walk up to her. She lifted her eyes and saw Kagene Rei and Rui, the terrifying new students!

"Hello, _Kagami_ - _san_ ," Rui spat.

"H- Hi?" Rin said uncertainly.

"So, you and Kagamine-kun are officially together now?" Rei asked.

"I guess so," Rin answered. Rui plopped down next to her.

"Wow, congratulations, Kagami-san!" she exclaimed with very badly faked smile. Then it turned into a real evil smirk.

"I know he slept with you. But you weren't his first one, you know."

"I wasn't?" Rin was surprised.

"Nope. He used to fuck me in middle school when we were like 12," Rui bragged even though that wasn't really something to be proud of. Rin couldn't believe her ears. She felt so betrayed! The guy she slept with wasn't a virgin!

"And you're not even his second one," Rei added. "You wanna know the truth? He's actually in a sexual relationship with your best friend, Hatsune Miku. He never loved you, he's just playing you."

Rin was feeling so betrayed that she couldn't even say anything anymore. Her heart was absolutely shattered. Surely the new shady students that were known to ruin people's lives with lies were telling the truth? She knew all along she shouldn't have trusted anybody even though she literally trusted everybody in this story!

Rin quickly got up and ran all the way home.

"Rin, why did you come home so early? Is something wrong? " her mom asked when Rin came in.

"Don't talk to me! You can't understand how I feel!" Rin yelled and ran to her room. She threw herself on her princess bed and couldn't hold her tears anymore. She started sobbing uncontrollably into her pillow.

Imagine a good, dramatic ending line here for this chapter because I sure as hell can't think of one right now!

 **~~~Chapter 4 ends here~~~**

* * *

 **I died while writing this chapter and then I came back and then I shot myself in the head and died and then I came back again and published this chapter**

 **I hope you didn't die while reading this**

 **Bye**


	5. Angst Wangst

Rin had wept on her bed for hours. Her mom came in to check on her, and as she opened the door, a tsunami of tears rolled over her. Mrs. Kagamine okaa-san swam over to her distressed daughter through the ocean of salty tears and sat next to her on the bed.

"Honey, what's wrong? Tell me!"

"NO! Don't talk to me! Don't pretend to care about me! You can never understand my struggles, You will never understand this… unbearable pain! NEVER!" Rin cried and took off her hairpins to let her overly long bangs hang emoishly over her face.

"Go away, get away from me!"

Rin's mom stood up quietly and left her alone. Rin sniffled loudly. Then she felt her phone vibrating under the pillow. The message was from that bitch Neru:

* * *

 **To: Kagamine Rin**

 **From: That bitch Akita Neru**

 _Lol, rui just told me the truth about you and lenny-kun. Hahaha bitch how does it feel not to be special anymore?_

* * *

When Rin read the mean text, sparkly spring water tears started rolling down her porcelain angel doll cheeks again.

" _Nobody will ever love me or care about me at all! I'm just a pathetic and repulsive and annoying and fat and stupid excuse of a human being! I sicken myself! Why did I even think Len-kun would love me? Maybe it was better for everybody if I just ended it all?"_ Rin thought depressedly.

Then she grabbed a knife (Rin, why do you have a knife in your room?) and started violently cutting her own wrists.

* * *

Rin kept wearing a fake smile on her face for the next day. But secretly on the inside, she felt like crying a river and slitting her wrists. She isolated herself from everybody else.

"Rinny-chan!~" she heard Miku call when she was sitting alone at lunch. Miku ran over to her table and sat beside her. Rin didn't say a word. She just coldly picked up her bento box and left.

" _How dare that two-faced bitch sit next to me as if we were the bestest friends!"_ Rin thought. She looked at her delicious lunch that her okaa-san had lovingly made for her dearest daughter, but she didn't feel hungry at all because now she suddenly has anorexia too!

Later that day, Miku decided to confront her.

"Rin-chan, what is this all about? You have been avoiding me all day! Why?"

Rin felt her blood boiling. Did that bitch Miku have any idea? Surely she was just acting stupid just to humiliate Rin! Rin clenched her fists so hard that blood came out. Is that even possible? Major cringe.

"You have _no idea_ why I'm avoiding you? Why won't you take a moment to think about what you've done, maybe you would figure it out?"

"…What I have done? But Rin-chan, I don't understand…"

"STOP IT! You know damn well what you have done! I know you're only trying to make a fool out of me, you liar bitch!" Rin screamed at Miku's face.

"Hey, what's going on? Why are you fighting?" asked Meiko, running over with Luka.

"I already know the truth, Miku! Kagene-san told me all about you and Len-kun! Just admit that you're sleeping with him!" Rin screamed.

"WHAT? I am NOT sleeping with Len-kun! I have a boyfriend, I would never steal Len-kun away from you!" Miku retorted.

"Why would I believe you, my bestest friend since childhood, over a new shady student who just recently transferred here and might be a bully? I knew I should not have trusted anybody ever again! I knew it since that one unmentioned super traumatic incident from my past that left me scarred with trust issues forever! And nobody, nobody in this world can ever understand!" Rin angsted.

"Rin-san, are you okay? Do you want us to get an adult to sort this out?" Luka asked worriedly.

"SHUT UP! I bet you two are going along with her evil plan too, aren't you? The whole world is against me! I'm so unwanted and unloved and completely entirely worthless, so I will just disappear! I will kill myself to death!" Rin wangsted.

Before anyone could say anything to calm her down, Rin was already running home.

"The school will ignore Kagami-san's constant spontaneous running away in the middle of the day," said Kiyoteru-sensei, who had suddenly appeared behind the girls.

* * *

Rin was sitting in the corner of her room with a dead, blank expression and cutting her bony anorexic arms with a knife.

"Nobody will care if I die. Now I will suicide myself!"

Rin was about to slit her wrist and die, but suddenly someone grabbed her hand that was holding the knife.

"Rin-chan, don't do it!" said Len, who somehow got into Rin's room to save her.

"Len-kun… Nante… Why did you do it?" Rin asked, tears threatening to spill.

"You have to listen to me, Rin-chan! Rui lied to you! Well, partially. It's true that I used to fuck Rui in middle school, I was quite a player back then. I stole all the 12-year-old hot ladies' virginities with my spaisu… But I am not cheating on you with Miku-san! I would never cheat on you or hurt you because you are the love of my life, Rin-chan!"

"Yay, I am now recovered from my serious mental illness!" said Rin, who was now recovered from her serious mental illness.

"So everything is okay now?"

"Yeah, thank you Len… I would be dead right now if you hadn't been here to stop me from killing myself by jumping off the school roof," said Rin and watched down from the school roof they were standing on. The author suddenly decided that it would be a cooler suicide method.

"Len-kun… will you always be mine and be mine always and always?" Rin whispered sensually, her eyes glistening in the sunset.

"Hai. Daisuki," Len said, his eyes also glistening in the sunset.

It was romantic as fuck.

* * *

 **Cancer**


	6. Fillah

**Thank you so much for the reviews, they really motivate me to keep writing! :)**

* * *

Now that the huge crisis was over, everything was happy and sunshines again. Rin and Len kept hanging out at school together and going on dates on an almost daily basis. They didn't spend so much time with Miku and the others anymore, so one day, Miku decided to have a big sleepover with everybody. And by everybody she meant her group of teh popularest girls and their boyfriends, teh popularest guys.

" _After all this drama, the readers definitely need some filler,"_ she thought.

On Thursday at lunch, Miku told her friends about her plans for the next Saturday.

"We can watch movies and eat snacks, and of course we'll paint each other's nails! It's gonna be so much TANOSHIIIIII~!" she squealed, her voice sounding like a squirrel that had been stepped on.

"Sounds very tanoshii, Miku-chan! Are the boys gonna be there too?" Rin asked.

"Of course they are! How could we have a sleepover without our dearest boyfriends? Girls simply can't manage without guys for one single night!"

* * *

 **~~Time skip to Saturday~~**

When the day finally came (They had to wait _two_ days), Rin was packing her pastel orange kawaii bunny packback- Author means backpack. She packed her hairbrushes, orange and yellow nail polishes, toothbrush, toothpaste, some clothes, 5 pantsu because you can never be too sure, a big bag of marshmallows with cute little faces on them, slippers, bathrobe and the most important thing: her new pajamas, which were a light orange silk top with white dot pattern and white lace and matching shorts. It looked kawaii and sexy at the same time. What she packed is of course the most important thing in this chapter and everybody cares.

"Rin-chan! Are you ready? Len-san is already waiting outside!" Rin's mom shouted.

"Coming!" Rin shouted back, picked up her backpack and ran downstairs girlishly.

The Kagamines' red car was waiting outside. Leon had promised to take Rin and Len to Miku's house, since neither of them had a license yet.

"Come on, Rin!" said Len from the back seat, opening the door for her. She sat next to him and closed the door. They both grinned widely. This was going to be the best night ever!

"We're here," said Leon suddenly. Well that was quick.

"Remember to have fun!" he shouted as the teenagers scrambled out of the car and rushed off.

"We'll forget!" Len said, but Leon couldn't hear it. Rin giggled because her dumb blonde mind thought it was funny.

"YAYYY! Rinny-chan and Lenny-kun are here!" Miku squealed as annoying as ever when she opened the door.

"Hi Miku-chan! Is everyone else here already?" Rin inquired.

"Yuppie-yup yuppings yuppers~~! You were the last ones to show up, like always!" It was a real miracle that Miku had any friends when she talked like that.

The blondes came in and saw all the people hanging out in the luxurious living room of the mansion. We can't forget that Miku lives in the fanciest mansion in the country!

There were Miku of course, her clone- I mean boyfriend Mikuo, Luka and Gabubo, Meiko and Kaito, and Teto and her clone- I mean boyfriend Ted, who, along with Mikuo, the readers probably didn't remember existing.

"Yeaaaaah, let's get dis party starteeeed!" slurred Meiko, who was slouching on the 500 000 dollar couch with a sake bottle in her hand. She was obviously drunk, what a low-life.

"She decided to start drinking already… Sorry," Kaito apologized.

"TRUTH OR DARE!" Miku screamed suddenly, startling everyone so hard that they fell out of their seats. Funneh.

* * *

The teenagers sat on the floor in a circle. _"Damn, I hate truth or dare,"_ Len and Rin thought. Now I recommend the readers to brace themselves for the very original game that is extremely rarely used in Fanfiction, truth or dare.

"Okay, who wants to go first? Who?" Miku asked excitedly, looking around the circle of friends. Nobody volunteered.

"Luka, you wanna go first!" Miku decided.

"What? I didn't-"

"TRUTH OR DARE?" Miku shouted.

"I guess I'll take truth."

"WHAT? Booooring! Oh well, let's see… how often do you have sex with Kakugo?"

"Each and every day," Luka answered and kissed her eggplant samurai sexily.

"Well, that was easy. Your turn, Luka." Miku said.

"Kaito, truth or dare?"

"Truth. I'm a pussy."

"AW COME ON!" Miku yelled. Luka thought for a moment.

"How much do you weigh? Since you eat ice cream every five minutes."

"That's rude!" Kaito retorted, hugging a large tub of aisu kuriimu, chibi tears forming in his eyes.

"You have to answer."

"Well, the truth is that I don't know. It's been a long time since the last time I stepped on a scale," Kaito said, scratching his neck. But Luka didn't give up; she grabbed Kaito by his stupid scarf and dragged him to the bathroom to weigh him. When they came back, Kaito had chibi tears in his anime eyes. It was clear that the number had not been exactly as small as he would have liked. In other words, he was a fat fuck. Everybody laughed at the humorous incident and Kaito sulked as he sat his ass down.

"Miku. Truth or dare?" he asked in a dark voice.

"Dare me, beotch!"

"Throw all your leeks away," Kaito ordered, a wicked smirk forming on his face cheeks.

"NUUU. MAH LEEKS." Miku cried, but nevertheless got up, gathered all her leeks from all kinds of weird places and then threw them out of the window, probably on someone's head.

"Be brave, Miku-chan!" Luka said and patted her back in consolation. Because losing leeks is as bad as someone dying.

Miku cheered up in a few seconds.

"Teto, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"Okay… Um… You have to drink this bottle of nail polish!" Miku said, holding up a big bottle of pretty blue nail polish. The redhead did what she was told and chugged down the contents of the bottle. Teto had a poisoning shock and nobody really cared.

After that came a few more truths and dares that we'll skip because everyone is obviously here for the RinxLen.

Now it was Gakopa's turn. (Who was naked by the way: he was dared to kill himself and when he refused to do it, he had to strip naked as a punishment)

"Rin! Truth or dare?" he asked devilishly.

"Um… Dare." Rin said.

"Make out with Len." Pagapo dared her, as if he couldn't have come up with anything worse.

Rin blushed as red as a- you guessed it- tomato. She turned to Len and started making out with him.

"WOOO!" Kagubo shouted hornily.

When the twins- I mean lovers were done, Len looked Rin in the eyes seductively and smirked like a smug dog.

"D- don't look at me like that, pervert baka!" Rin said and blushed as red as a tomato, acting all tsundere despite having absolutely zero reason to do so since she and Len were already a couple and all.

* * *

 **~~1 hour later ~~**

After the very intense and dramatic game of truth and dare, the friends decided to watch some movies. First, they picked a generic kowai horror movie that makes all girls scream, named "A Generic Kowai Horror Movie That Makes All Girls Scream."

Miku and Rin were watching the movie very intensely, hugging each other tightly and screaming when a scary part came. Kaito and Lakupo had their dirty hentai hands in the big popcorn bowl, which from they kept shoving handfuls of popcorn into their man mouths. Meiko was drinking her precious sake on the couch.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!" the girls screamed when a woman got her throat cut open. Meiko, who was drunk again, spilled her sake all over Miku's 500 000 dollar couch.

"Oops, I ruined your 500 000 dollar couch," she said drunkenly.

"T- that's nice, M- meiko…" stuttered Miku, who trembled, pale as a ghost.

"Kowaiiii~" Rin wailed.

When the kowai movie was over, the girly girlies wanted to watch a romantic chick flick. Of course, all the guys groaned, because guys don't care about romance.

Fast forward, because the author does not care about any romance not involving Rin and Len. Now the movie was almost over. It was time for the dramatic ending scene, in weebish Japanese.

" _Kenji-kun! Ahh… Anata ga daisuki desu!"_

" _Mitsuki-san… Anata wa totemo kawaii desu…_ _Aishiteru!"_

(Bibbity bobbity, it's time to stoppity, says narrator)

 _~OWARI~_

(Thank sweet Jesus)

All the girls had sparkly tears in their eyes, because everybody knows that all girls cry when they are feeling feelings.

"Waaaahhh!~" They cried for the sappy ending.

"Gimme a break," Len mumbled, even though he had secretly enjoyed the movie.

* * *

 **~~1 hour later ~~**

The boys were hanging in the bedroom they would be staying in. Miku had decided that the girls and boys would sleep in separate wings of the mansion. The girls got the east wing and the boys got the west wing.

"Blah blah blah. Aisu, Meiko, blah blah," chattered Kaito.

"Yap yap yap Luka, eggplant samurai, hentai, blah blah yap!" blabbered Baguko.

Mikuo and Ted were not even worth mentioning.

"I wonder what the girls are doing right now," Len wondered.

"Ha ha, I bet they're talking about us! Girls always talk about guys at a slumber party," Gakuop declared.

 **~~Meanwhile with the girls ~~**

"You know that moment when you go to the bathroom to take a dump and the shit slips straight into the pipe and disappears, and when you look at the empty toilet you're suddenly not sure if you really pooped at all?" Miku asked while she was painting Rin's nails.

"Oh my god! That happens to me all the time!" Luka exclaimed.

"I bet the boys think we're talking about them," Meiko smirked, admiring her red shiny polished nails.

"Len-kun…" Rin mumbled dreamily.

"Hah! I knew they were talking about us!" A familiar samurai neko voice came from the other side of the door. The girls jolted.

"Shut up, Gacugugo! Now they know we're spying on them!" Kaito said in an equally loud voice. God knows how these two idiots can even tie their own shoelaces.

"Rrrrrr… RRRRRRRRRAAAAAGGGHHHH!" Meiko roared, turning into the demonic berserk mode of Meiko, that is triggered by perverts and is very original to this story. Demonic berserk Meiko marched up to the door and kicked it down breaking it into splinters, breaking Miku's property once again for the rule of funny. Then she kicked Kaito in the family jewels so hard that even the other boys could feel the pain.

"Run away!" Copacabana screamed in a high pitched voice and began to run away with the other guys, leaving Kaito lying half-dead on the floor.

* * *

 **~~Later at night ~~**

Everybody was asleep. Suddenly, Rin woke up to her Len-sense tingling.

"My Len-sense is tingling," she said.

"Shut up, we're sleeping!" Miku said and fell back to sleep.

Rin got up and tiptoed to the empty hallway. The floor was shiny and it felt very cold under her feet. She noticed a large, fancy balcony in the end of the hallway. The expensive, fancy double doors with giant windows were wide open. On the fancy balcony with marble floors and pillars (Okay we get it, Miku lives in a mansion, we get it already!) she could see a dark silhouette against the moon that looked so unrealistically gigantic that it could've been crashing into the earth soon. She immediately recognized the figure as her beloved koibito.

Rin walked towards the boy. She was wearing a white, silky, airy nightgown that even the author has no idea where it came from.

"I've been waiting for you…" Len spoke in the moonlight, his words sounding so cheesy that cheese could as well have been pouring out of his mouth.

"I know," Rin replied strangely. The night was ethereal. He looked mysterious and brooding. This ending was really weird and it had nothing to do with anything and the narrator is honestly so stumped right now.

 **~~This chapter ends here ~~**

* * *

 **I'm eating ice cream right now and Steven Universe is coming back tomorrow**

 **Life is great**


	7. Why does Rin always get hurt

**To whoever is still reading this li'l story of mine: Sorry I haven't updated in a while! I have been so, so busy lately. And by "busy" I mean lazy.**

 **I was going to write when summer started, but then I went to Stockholm and stuff**

 **Peace The WARRIOR: Your stories are awesome, too! I remember BBML being one of the first Vocaloid fics I've ever read when I was about 12.**

* * *

It was time for gym class in Vocaloid High. Our beloved daughter Rin was changing into her sekkushi Japanese PE uniform, consisting of a white shirt and bloomers. She took off her shirt and got major depressive disorder when she looked at her A-cup boobies. She shifted her eyes to Meiko and Luka, who were chatting with each other, shirtless. Rin stared jealously and not at all creepily at her friends' huge knockers.

Suddenly, the door opened and some guys just barged in, shouting pervy things.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" all the girls screamed, trying to hide their chests with their shirts.

"PERVERRRRRTS!"

No male in the Vocaloid world had any sense of decency and respect whatsoever.

* * *

"Today we will be playing volleyball," informed the gym teacher, Tonio.

The students were divided into teams with both girls and boys. Conveniently, Rin ended up in the same team with Len and all her friends. The other team included Kaito's brother Akaito, who was a rude athletic man-bitch, and that bitch Neru Akita. Also all the rest were bitches of some degree too.

When the teacher blew his whistle, Akaito jumped up and mercilessly slammed the ball to the other team's side with a gross grin on his face. Immediately, a spark of determination flashed in Len's eyes and he whammed the ball back to the other side so hard that it caught on fire mid-air and slammed into the floor, creating a smoking crater. The bitch team was shocked, serves them right because they were such bitches.

"Wow, Len-kun! That was really good!" Rin said in awe, blushing slightly at the smexy sight of her sweating boyfriend. Len looked at her and gave her the most shota ikemen adorable cool bara smile that almost swiped Rinny off her feet.

"Thanks," he said hotly.

While drooling over Lenny-kun, Rin didn't notice that the ball was coming towards her.

"Kagami-san! It's right to ya!" a random guy shouted.

"Oh, right!"

Rin started running backwards to catch the ball, but like the clumsy moeblob she was, she clumsily tripped over nothing and fell down painfully, spraining her ankle.

"I have sprained my ankle!" she moaned hysterically, clutching her dainty ankle and for some unexplained reason fainting immediately.

"RIN-CHAN!" Len cried.

"Kagamine-kun, can you take her to the infirmary?" Tonio asked.

"Hai, sensei!" Len lifted Rin on his back and started piggybacking her to the infirmary. Rin's girlfriends started over-worriedly wondering aloud if Rin was going to be okay, because the world is totally spinning around that twerp.

Len knocked on the door of the nurse's office. Almost immediately, the door was opened by the school nurse, Sakura Neko-No-Koneko Kitsune Ichigone (The UTAU of Author's friend, who basically bribed her to include her in this story because it's her "favorite story evaaar!" Also, completely unrelated to the Sakura who briefly appeared in chapter 2)

The nurse was wearing a kinky baby pink nurse dress that barely went past her buttocks; it was also unbuttoned at the top, almost completely revealing her balloonish mammaries that were squished together like the dress could pop at any second. She also wore pink hooker heels and one of those funny little nurse hats you only see in cartoons. Basically, she was dressed in an outfit that would get any real life school nurse (or anyone who is not a sex worker) fired in a blink of an eye.

"Oh my, what happened?" the Sakura-Kitsune-whatever gasped when she saw an unconscious Rin on Len's back.

"Kagami-san sprained her ankle! This is what will happen next: you'll treat her and disappear to god knows where, and when she wakes up, the room will be dark for some reason and I'll be sitting there beside her. Then hot stuff will happen," Len explained. The boy knew his fanfics pretty well.

* * *

 **~~~Some time later~~~**

Rin opened her eyes and hazily sat up in the room that was dark for some reason. She noticed she was in a soft, white bed.

" _Where am I? How did I get here?"_ she thought, having trouble remembering the events of the day. Come on Rin, you have a sprained ankle, not a freaking concussion.

"Rin, thank goodness you woke up… Are you feeling okay?" she heard a husky, worried voice. When she turned her head, she saw none other than Len. Gee, who could possibly be tired of seeing his face? There's nothing better than every dramatic reveal in the story always turning out to be the same person.

"H-hai, Len-kun…" Rin answered weakly, all frail and dramatic like the girls in medieval stories.

"I'll give you some of my… medicine…" Len whispered into her ear and hornily bit off a piece of her earlobe. Then he slid his fingers into Rin's orange striped pantsu and started rubbing. Rin moaned in ecstasy as Len juiced her orange. They were both sweating like pigs as Len's banana shot up; they snuggled deeper under the sheets that smelt like disinfectants and last week's stomach bug.

All of this was happening during school hours, mind you.

"Condoms are in the top drawer!" the nurse's voice came from behind the door, where she was watching the display, her nose bleeding a river.

 **~~~This chapter ends here~~~**

* * *

 **Not very proud of this chapter. Just wanted to update.**

 **I think I'm going to wrap this up pretty soon. A joke can only be funny for so long...**

 **Toods**


	8. SORRY FOR THE SHORT CHAPPIE

**~~~In the evil lair of Neru Akita~~~**

"I have to find a way to get Len-kun all for myself!" Neru mused to herself, lying on her evil couch and pondering how she could get rid of Rin, preferably in a way that would humiliate her and make her suffer.

"I know!" she suddenly exclaimed, apparently having formed a complete evil plan in mere seconds.

Then she sprang up and dashed away to put her evul plan into action, while cackling evilly: "MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" with her high-pitched, nasally, totally-not-pitched-up-miku voice.

 **Author-chan: GOME NASAI FOR THE SHORT CHAPPIE!~~~ T^T**

 **I AM NOT SHINE! WHICH MEANS DED**

 **I'M ALWAYS SO BUSY WITH SCHOOL STUFF AND MY MANGOS AND ANIMUS (Narrator: That first part is a lie. That fat ass no-life otaku never fucking touches her homework.)**

 **ALSO MY MOM TOOK MY COMPUTER AWAY BECAUSE SHE IS CONCERNED ABOUT ME AND THINKS IT'S STEALING MY SOUL. SHE SAYS I HAVE TO GO OUT MORE AND MAKE SOME FRIENDS THAT AREN'T JAPANESE 2D CHARACTERS. THAT BAKA DON'T UNDERSTAND THAT OTAKU IS WHO I REALLY AM!~~~ BAKA OKAA-SAN!~** **（＞** **д** **＜）**

 **Rin: Author-chan, Len-kun is making out with a banana!**

 **Len: BANANA GOOD**

 **Author-chan: *TAKES OUT A VIDEO CAMERA* FUFUFUFUFU SO GOOD HENTAI MATERIAL~~~**

 **Rin: *Takes out her rooda-rooraa* I'LL CRUSH YOU FOR FUNSIES, LEN-KUN! WE ARE SO OUT OF CHARACTER BECAUSE IT IS FUNNEH**

 **Len: NOOOO AUTHOR-CHAN DO SOMETHING! *is crushed***

 **Author-chan: LOL BYE LEN**

 **(Narrator: And now she's pretending to talk with her fanfiction characters... You know, maybe her mom had a point.)**

 **~~~This super short chapter ends here~~~**

* * *

 **I wrote a short chapter to parody short chapters so I'm really no better than them.**

 **Note: "Author" is purely a fictional parody character and by no means represents the author of this story in any way.**


	9. Kokoro, Lolita Len and also kidnapping

**Kokoro, because it hasn't been used frequently enough in fanfics**

 **Happy birthday, Kaito**

* * *

It was lunchtime in Vocaloid Academy. The birds were chirping and the sun was shining. Things were overall well in Kagaminelandia- I mean Vocaloid world. Rin Kagamine was writing song lyrics under a blossoming sakura tree in the schoolyard, because as you know, Vocaloids are super talented at singing and music although it hasn't been mentioned a single time in this story.

Luka, who hasn't yet done anything worth mentioning in this story aside from having a gigantic bust, walked over to see what Rin was doing. While she was walking, her massive, melon-like mammaries jiggled and bounced up and down and right and left sexily. Did I already mention she had big boobs?

"What are you doing, Rin-chan?" Luka asked in her silky, soft, mature, boob-ish voice.

"Uh… nothing…" Rin said, hiding her light pink kawaii spiral notebook behind her back.

"Were you writing a song?" Luka inquired, smiling breastily.

"Y- Yes… it's for Len-kun…"

"Can I see it?"

"Sure!"

Luka leaned in to grab the notebook, resulting in her bulky bosom smacking Rin in the face like a wrecking ball. A stab of envy shot through Rin at the sight of her friend's udder that was, mind you, quite sizable.

As we all know, in the Kagaminelandia- I mean Vocaloid world, cup size is a measurement of a woman's value as a human being; the bigger, the better.

Luka started reading the fresh song. (Of Bel-Air)

"I named it Kokoro," Rin said bashfully, even though she was secretly very proud of the song.

 **[Insert 'Kokoro' lyrics here]**

"Wow, Rin-chan… That was really good!" Luka sniffled, wiping tears from her eyes with her boobs.

"That was amaziiing~~~!" squealed Miku, holy shit, where did she come from!?

"Ah! No… It's not really that good or special!" Rin mumbled, her face as red as a certain vegetable from embarrassment.

"You can really feel the emotion in the song," Luka praised.

"Well, I did write it with Len-kun in mind… I'm not sure how, but it really describes my endless love for him and how meeting him saved me from the bottomless pit of despair that I was stuck in in my former, miserable life," babbled Rin who had always been stunningly beautiful, had a big group of supportive friends and lived in a big, expensive mansion with a loving mother.

"Hey girls, mind if we sit our asses down in this spot and eat our bento?" asked Kaito, who had just walked under the sakura tree with Gahako and already planted his posterior firmly on the ground.

"Go ahead!" Luka said.

"Where's Len?" Rin asked because that's all she ever cares about.

"His fan club caught him. I don't even want to think about what they are doing to him right now…" Kaito said, prompting a cutaway to the "Len in a dress" scene that is obligatory for literally all stories.

* * *

 **~~~The "Len in a dress" scene~~~**

"FUFUFUFUFU," Len's fangurls laughed ominously because all anime girls make that sound when they laugh.

"No! I beg you, please don't do this to me!" Len wailed, kawaii baby tears welling up in his big shota eyes.

"Leeen-kuuun~ Put this on~!" some brown-haired faceless background bitch purred.

The girls were holding up the frilliest, girliest possible sailor Lolita outfit. Because it is exceedingly common in the Kag- Voca- heck, in the entire animu world of Nipponese cartoons for girls to have a hardcore fetish for young boys wearing dresses. Only god knows why and he doesn't even want to.

"IYAAAAAA!"

The girls went all "FUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUUFUFUFUFUFUUFUUUUUUUFUUUU-" again and had that anime look on their face. You know the one where the upper half of the face is all black and there are gleams in the place of their eyes. Then they grabbed their precious sex object- I mean Len-kun and started freaking undressing him against his will.

Sexual harassment is a funny humorous comedy joke. Ha. Ha. Ha.

Len could sue you all.

"FUFUFU~ LOOK AT HIS SEXY NAKEY BUTT~…"

"NOOOOOOO!"

* * *

 **~~~Back to the others~~~**

"Like I said, I don't want to know," Kaito huffed.

"Do you guys want to see this cool song Rin wrote for Len?" Miku asked, snatching the notebook and handing it to the boys before Rin could protest.

Kaito and Babucko read the lyrics and cried like babies.

"Damn, Rin! I had no idea you were such a great songwriter!" Kaito gasped.

"Well, we _are_ Vocaloids who go to a school for the exceptionally musically gifted…" Rin said.

"Literally nobody mentioned this until this chapter," Kakkapoo said.

"That was the most beautiful combination of words written to be accompanied by music that I have ever come across," Meiko bawled. Wait, what?

"It is absolutely heartbreaking but so good," sniffled Haku, who has only briefly appeared in this story once before.

"Hey, what's going on?" Miki asked and eyed the lyrics.

"No. What are you doing. Please don't read it." Rin said in a deadpan voice while practically shoving the notebook to the other's faces.

Miki read it.

And then Yukari read it. And then Mayu read it. And then Maika. Zunko. Galaco. Rion. Avanna. YOHIOloid. Yanhe. Rana. Kokone. V-Flower. Ruby. Cyber Diva. Cyber Songman. Yuezheng Ling. Fukase. Dex. Daina. Chika. Anon. Kanon. Sachiko. UNI. Arsloid. Sachiko. Nemu. Una. Kohaku. Xin Hua. Lorra. Rune. Matcha. Azuki.

"Since when has there been so many fucking Vocaloids?" Rin asked.

And in the end, practically the entire population of Kagaminela- Vocaloid world (sans Len for obvious reasons) was there marveling at Rin's outstanding lyrical work.

It was awesome.

 **~~~Elsewhere~~~**

Len Kagamine was sneaking home from school, crying from embarrassment all the while.

He felt an inconvenient breeze in his family jewels, clad in pink pantsu that were made of uncomfortably thin fabric. As Len struggled to pull the hem of the kawaii-lolita-styled sailor-fuck-u thing lower to shield his precious oranges and banana, he wondered how many times the same "joke" can be used in fan fictions and still be funny.

* * *

 **~~~At the prom~~~**

Yes, because suddenly out of nowhere…

PROM!1!2!

This story is a train wreck.

Rin was wearing an orange and yellow princess dress with black heels, black long gloves and a black bow. Her hair was curled slightly, making her resemble a doll or an angel or whatever pure innocent thing you feel like comparing her with.

As she stepped into the gym, literally everybody turned their heads to stare at the pure hotness, sexiness and perfectness that was radiating from our heroine.

And then fucking Len waltzed towards her with his fucking Len smile, wearing a fucking yellow shirt and a fucking black vest and fucking black pants. And he had that fucking banana ponytail that was very fucking.

He was… _sekushi._

"May I have this dance?" he asked in his smooth, low, mellow voice that made every girl in a five mile radius aggressively orgasm.

"Oh yes, Len-kun!"

They were of course the best dancers at the prom. Nobody else was dancing so the twins- er, Rin and Len were dancing in the middle of the floor, the spotlight entirely on them.

Soon, it was time to announce the Prom King and Queen.

"And Prom King and Queen are… Len Kagamine and Rin Kagamagami!1"

"I AM SO SURPRISED!" everyone else exclaimed in genuine surprise.

And then Rin woke up. It was all just a dream, HAHAHA- fuck you, readers. Turns out that now she was about to be late for the actual prom!

"Crap! I'm going to be late!" Rin shouted her usual line.

* * *

 **~~~At the actual, really real completely-not-a-dream prom. Not fake~~~**

Rin was running towards the gym where the prom had already started, but suddenly she bumped into a stranger because that is seriously the only way to meet new people. She fell on her ass.

"Itaii…" she whined in an annoying Japanese voice.

"I'm sorry, are you okay?" asked the boy she had bumped into. Rin couldn't believe her eyes when she lifted her face up to look at him. The boy looked just like Rin! And it was totally not Len.

"Yes, sorry for bumping into you… uh… gotta go!" she said sheepishly and quickly ran away. But this incident left her feeling a bit strange, and also questioning her parents.

However before she reached the gym, Rin realized she needed to pee quite badly. So she headed to the bathroom very quickly. Rin did what needed to be done and was ready to go. She tried to open the door, but it wouldn't budge. She tried again and again. The door was stuck.

Suddenly Rin heard the evil cackle of Nero Akita, that Akita bitch's nerdy brother, from the other side of the door. Because it is totally very smart and wise to give yourself away like that.

* * *

Meanwhile, Len was waiting for his princess at the prom and was getting impatient already.

" _What if something has happened to her? She hasn't left me, has she? Oh no, have I not been good enough for her?"_

All these stupid questions were swimming around in his shota head, when Neru the main bitch herself walked up to him and started batting her eyelashes at him all cute.

"Hey, Len-kun, wanna dance with me?"

"But I'm waiting for Rin-chan…"

"She hasn't arrived yet? Well, I don't think she was ever good enough for you anyway. That bitch was probably just playing you," Neru said. That was a lie, because…

 _SHE KNEW EXACTLY WHERE RIN WAS_. Dun dun duuun!

"Maybe it's true…" Len said sadly, totally falling for the lie because apparently he had more faith in a creepy fangirl than his only true loved one.

"Okay, Neru-san… I shall accept your request to dance with me!"

* * *

 **~~~Later~~~**

"And now, the moment you all have been waiting for: it is time to announce this year's Prom King and Prom Queen!" some random person said into the microphone. Author, try to even try.

"This year's Prom King and Prom Queen are…"

Rin had somehow escaped the bathroom and got to the gym just in time to hear:

"LEN KAGAMINE AND NERU AKITA!"

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Rin shouted in slow motion. "How could you do this to me, Len-kun?" She cried, wet tears running down her cheeks made of skin.

"Hey, we exist too," Meiko reminded, referring to herself, Kaito, Luka, Gopuko, Miku and her clone who nobody cares about. Because obviously none of these wonderful couples was cuter.

Neru and Len were up on the stage with crowns placed upon their heads, holding a fuckton of flowers in their arms.

"And now it's time for the kiss!"

In a split second, Akita bitch had slipped her slutty tongue into Len's pure, innocent ex-12-year-old-playboy mouth.

Then Len spotted Rin from the crowd of like a thousand people. She was _crying._ And that's worse than Satan and Stalin and the apocalypse.

He quickly shoved Neru away.

"No… I'm sorry, Neru-san, but I can't do this."

A few seconds of silence followed.

"…WHAT!?" Neru looked and sounded like an erupting volcano. How, go figure.

"I love Rin so much, she is the light of my life which would be very miserable and dark without her," Len explained.

"Oh, Len!" Rin sighed, crying tears of joy now.

"I will never, ever leave you, Rin! Even though earlier I was convinced that you were a playing bastard who bailed on me on purpose, now it's all magically forgotten!" Len said.

Neru whipped out her yellow cell phone and spoke into it:

"Plan B."

Len attempted to run to his precious Rinny, but furious Neru grabbed his banana ponytail firmly.

"Now I will kidnap you!" Neru declared and kidnapped Len.

"NOOOO!" Len cried, making the "D:" face.

* * *

"What just happened?" a dumbfounded Kaito asked, reflecting the thoughts of the readers of this shit.

"Len-kun is gone…" Rin sniffled. "And I didn't even have the chance to sing _Kokoro to_ him…"

But then as suddenly as everything else happens in this story apparently, her grief was replaced with determination.

" _No! I can't just sit here crying and let her take Len away from me!_ " she thought. With her newfound confidence, Rin shouted a very cringy, animesque line:

"With the power of my song, I will save you, Len-kun!"

* * *

 **I'm back and shittier than ever.**

 **So many new Vocaloids. Who actually keeps track of all of 'em? Arsloid. "Arse-loid"?**


End file.
